NRI Maami

I watched Evano Oruvan yesterday. The intention of the post of course is not to review the movie, because there are many others who could do a better job. I couldn’t help noticing however that amid the many pitiable characters played in the movie, one that was totally missed out was that of Madhavan’s son.

They do show this little boy (Varun I think) being ordered around by the mother, being accused of failing in three subjects, the mother having an argument with the father about whether or not he should join the tuition class, but yet, whenever Madhavan thinks of his family only his daughter and wife are in the picture. Even at his workplace, he has a picture of only his daughter. Even when he calls home after three days, he only asks about his daughter.

The director seems to have totally forgotten about the poor little boy being a part of that family. Quite weird, actually…

The three day marathon of Pongal is quite over. However, this year I was way too preoccupied to really worry about Pongal too much and it ended up being merely observed versus being celebrated. Bhogi was a working day. I woke up late, and so could not find time to even make a simple sweet in the morning. Came back home very tired, and my husband (quite surprisingly and unusually) offered to make Pongal that same evening instead of the next morning, because he was going to be on a conference call from early in the morning. So, under my able guidance, we managed the Chakkarai pongal (which ended up tasting pretty good) on Bhogi night itself (so what, it was Pongal day in India). On Pongal day, once again, woke up late, could not even pack lunch and survived on a tasting menu offered by my colleagues for lunch. That evening, I made a simple Ven pongal. My daughter was sick and just not co-operative, so could not make anything to go with the Pongal and my interest in it was automatically diminished. On Kanu day, my daughter and I managed to keep Kanu in the garage. The deck would have been  much more suitable, but with her nose already clogged and her signs of heading for a fever, the last thing I wanted was for her to stand in the cold for 10 minutes keeping Kanu. So, we headed to the garage with our multicolor ‘pudis’. No turmeric leaves or banana leaves - so had to make do with aluminium foil. No sugarcane or beetle leaves, so skipped that whole part. Just did the pudis which my daughter surprisingly understood from the first one she did. She was very careful not to let them roll out of the aluminium foil. After having done that, we circumvented it thrice - she thought it was a fun game, and then off we went to daycare and work. The only kalandha sadham was thenga sadham. So by all standards, I’d have to say this year’s pongal was a pretty shoddy affair.

I was physically too tired, my daughter was sick and cranky, my husband was out of town for 1 of 3 days and I just hadn’t got things organized enough.

I guess I will make up for it during Karadayan Nombu which it seems arrives on a Friday, but it’s a simple event too and can be managed hopefully.

I did enjoy all the Pongal special movies on SunTV which I recorded on the DVR and watched at night. Certainly more interesting than watching interviews of unknown directors and cameramen.

Ever heard of PHDD? I am sure you never have. It is nothing but Post Holiday Dysfunction Disorder! In this country (which would mean the United States), there is so much emphasis on the holidays (a.k.a Christmas and New Year), that once it has passed, the resulting void in ones life, that of having nothing to wait for during a bleak and cold winter is quite unbearable. Especially when, you have just been spoilt by almost 10 days of vacation/working from home, a 2 day weekend suddenly feels unacceptable, unqualifiable as a weekend, in fact my last weekend was spent sulking in denial that it was not weekend enough for me to enjoy.

At work, everything almost comes to a stop during the holidays, but people know that work will come poring in after New year to make up for the last 2 weeks of near-zero activity, and that usually helps people bounce back from the holiday mood. In my case however, things have been dull over the past 2 weeks - my client fell sick and hasn’t come to work. So I am spending useful billable time, wallowing in sorrow over the slow pace of my work life.

So, what is the big deal about these holidays? In India, I’ve never really missed the absence of a 10 day vacation. Perhaps, it is because the Hindu calendar has it’s holidays much better distributed. Every now and then, there will be a festival to celebrate. In schools, there will also be festivals that you don’t necessarily celebrate like a few Ids, Mahavir Jayanthi, etc.. In addition to that, growing up in a highly volatile place like Hyderabad, we were often subject to more unexpected holidays in the form of PWG bandhs, Naxalite bandhs, Opposition party bandhs, Ruling party bandhs… you get the general idea? So one never really had to look forward to holidays, they would just come and go and were enjoyed where they were deserved or observed where they weren’t. In fact, I’ve never really even waited for a weekend as much as I do here. It’s not like I was not busy there, yet, somehow I don’t think I burnt myself out during the week as much as I seem to do here. I spend 2 hours a day driving back and forth to work. It’s a whole different matter, what my time there is spent doing, but it’s enough if everyone knows that I don’t lift sacks of grain and carry it on my back all day long. Yet, it seems like 9 hours of sleep is insufficient and 24 hours in a day is way to less to get things done at home and work. So quite obviously, 2 days a week for a weekend is just not enough to unwind, then relax and then gear up for the next week.

Darn.. I just can’t put my finger on the problem here.. Umph!

2007 is over and done with and the whole world has welcomed 2008 in it’s own way. New Year for all practical purposes starts on January 1st, at least for those that follow the English calendar for normal day to day stuff.

New Year eve was spent at home with hubby working on a 500 piece jigsaw puzzle. Pretty low key considering some of the things I’ve done in the past. My first recollection of new year eve celebration, was when I was around 8. We had dinner with our neighbours, and watched Doordarshan’s programmes on their new Onida color TV. Asha Bhosle did the grand finale at midnight which was a song titled ‘Naya Saal hai Aap Sabko Mubarak’, which was an ok song that I, for some weird reason can remeber the words for. For about 8 years after that, I remember all new year eves were spent at get-togethers. Pot-luck dinner with a bunch of families (friends), followed by games of some kind for us kids, and then loud happy new year shouting at midnight. At what ended up being the last new year party for a long time, I dressed up in a ghaghra and danced around midnight with all other kids. For over 4 years after that, we spent living in a nondescript place off NH-47 where social life was closer to zero than 10 power -50. The new year just before I got married, we were in a slightly better place, where all the apartment folks had a pot luck dinner, but everything was wrapped up well before midnight. The first year after I was married, new year was so uneventful, I don’t even remember where I was and what I was doing. After we got to the US, things got a little better. The first new year eve in the US, we were at a typical new year party at our friend’s place. Lot of loud music, alcohol, dancing. My husband and I were two of the few tee-totallers trying to have a good time in the midst of all the other folks who had thrown shyness to the winds and having a good time dancing etc.. At the last minute, just after midnight, as we prepared to leave, my husband slipped on a perfectly normal wooden floor and ended up fracturing his foot. For the next two months, I ended up cleaning snow on the car every morning because of his handicap. The year after that I was pregnant and one of my best friends came over for new year. We had a small gathering of three families, and spent new year’s eve playing monopoly. Last new year eve was spent first at a kid’s birthday party where we finished dinner and then with two other families at our home, more or less waiting for midnight so everyone could go home (boring would be an understatement, especially if you asked my guests).  This new year eve ( couple of days ago) was spent waiting for my daughter to go to sleep. She eventually gave up and slept around 11:15 p.m. Then, my husband and I started on a favorite hobby of ours - doing jigsaw puzzles. At midnight, we wished each other, wished our parents, jigsaw-puzzled for a little while longer and went to sleep at about 1:30 a.m.

Times have so changed… but no matter what we do on new year eve, we welcome every year with the same hopes, aspirations and excitement in anticipation of experiences to come. 

Happy New Year all you folks!