Since, it has been decided that of late I’ve been capable of writing only about going to India, going to other places or about movies that attract painfully long comments, it’s now time to write about the latest vacation I had. Yeah, yeah… all you folks in India are saying not again! But you see, we hard working desis in the land of america, are not lucky enough to get unexpected bandh holidays, or unknown and uncelebrated festival holidays. We get one long weekend per season, and since we do not have to catch a kovai express or a dadar express back home, we usually fill up our gas tanks with a sigh and go in search of some waterbody that has a semblance of a beach.

This time, we went to Sault Ste. Marie, Michigan. It is a quiet place in the upper peninsula (UP) of Michigan on the border with Canada. Even though upper michigan, more specifically Mackinac Island is a place well frequented by desis, this part of UP is probably not as well known or well visited by tourists. Saulte Ste. Marie’s claim to fame is the Soo Locks. Ships of all sizes that travelled from Lake Superior to the lower great lakes had to unload all their goods at Sault Ste. Marie. They were then transported around and loaded into other ships on the other side, until they decided to build the Soo Locks. The Soo Locks then helped ships move across from one side to the other in spite of the 21 ft drop. After a 2 hours boat trip on the Soo Locks, we caught up some sleep and then headed to the local beach at Sherman Park. Sherman park is the town’s only public beach and even though it is not any where in the league of ‘namma Marina beach’, it was a fun place, mainly because it was clean and not crowded. The water here was really shallow, about knee length for about a quarter mile in. So, needless to say we enjoyed ourselves a lot just pushing around each other in the water and wading all the way to a tiny strip of sand some distance in. We also witnessed a beautiful sunset from Sherman park.

Sunset at Sault Ste. Marie

On our way back from Sault Ste. Marie to Chicago, we decided to take part of the scenic Lake Michigan Circle tour through Wisconsin. We drove along Lake Michigan and had a view of the lake for most of the journey. On the way, we stopped at the sight of a beautiful beach and lighthouse at Manistique, MI. If at Sault Ste. Marie, we had not bothered to take pictures, because we were too busy getting wet in the beach, this place was waiting to be photographed. It was such a peaceful and calm feeling, just looking at the vast expanse of water, the lone red lighthouse and the waves crashing on the rocks.

Manistique Lighthouse

In all it was an ideal vacation. We had a good drive, enjoyed the journey, just did what we felt like without having to stand for hours in queues, enjoyed good old nature and came back happy to be home. Definitely makes me believe, that we should look for places like this rather than rushing to the usual NYC or Niagara falls.

Warning: If you are one of the few people who hasn’t already seen or read reviews of this movie, be warned that there are spoilers in here.

Dasavatharam was a hugely anticipated movie, and with good reason. Kamal Hassan acts in 10 different roles including that of George Bush and an 8 ft giant. However, the movie was not appreciated as much as it was anticipated. Some of my friends in blogosphere attributed it to Kamal’s inability to age gracefully, or his high ambition and ego. All along I thought the movie was good, something new and unexpected, but even I never quite understood why he had made a movie that seemed like it was a bunch of people thrown in together, until this morning, when I received a rambling comment on a previous post (which I deleted later). That explained the whole concept, and I am now able to appreciate it much better.

Those who are interested in understanding it, go ahead and read this comment by someone who calls himself Kamal.

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This is a forwarded message -

FOR THOSE WHO LOVED DASAVATHARAM AND ALSO FOR THOSE WHO CUDNT UNDERSTAND THE CONCEPT!!!!!!!!!!

Too many doubts about correlation of the movie, Chaos theory and Butterfly Effect have come into Picture….!!!

The movie clearly states about Chaos Theory and Butterfly Effect [Kamal says it in his Speech in the Movie ]

The concept of “CHAOS THEORY” and “BUTTERFLY EFFECT”, by itself is a complex concept, which mainly highlights the happening of huge unimaginable things because of least probable things…!!!!

Dasa although deals with these concept, but does not necessarily confuse anyone with it,,,, As i said earlier, its mainly “YOU”… that plays a factor in how the movie gets along with “YOU”.

You have got to be Case 1 or Case 2 as i have said earlier in this entry,,, No use being Half Baked…..!!!!

To just brief about these Concepts,

Q: What is Chaotic System ?
A: Basically a chaotic system is one wherein long term predictions are impossible.Like for example,if I push a car, I know that it is going to move and it will continue to do so if I go on pushing it on and on.However,in a chaotic system,this situation cannot be predicted over a long period of time.
Weather for example is a chaotic system.No matter how good your instruments are,you simply cannot predict the weather with 100% accuracy over a long term basis and forecast it.

Q: What is the Butterfly Effect ?
A: It is the most important component of a chaotic system.Basically,small perturbations results in amplifications which completely destroys the original nature of the system and makes prediction impossible.
If a butterfly flaps its wings in Africa,it could result in a cyclone in USA.(Mark the word COULD).A highly dumbed down explanation of the butterfly effect is in the film Anniyan,where Vikram’s sister dies because a liquor shop owner sells liquor on a dry day.

Q: OK, how does Dasa incorporate it ?
A: In essence,Dasa talks about 8 characters who are inconsequential as such,but are integrated in a larger picture.Without Bush,the plane would have been called back.Without Shinghen, Govind would be dead.Without the tsunami,the world would have been destroyed.Even Krishnaveni Patti plays a very important role.If she had not put the vial in the idol,maybe Govind would have recovered it then and there and a powerful weapon would have been unleashed.The very fact that it went into the idol meant that it was being accelerated to its destiny.Without Kaifulla Khan, Govind would have never escaped;the list simply goes on.

Q:OK,so does the film talk about theism or atheism?
A:Neither.It talks about how humans drive the destiny of the world.

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The movie does Show ” A Butterfly ” flying accross the screen after the Tsunami Attcck, clearly indicating that the Tsunami is an Outcome of ” The Butterfly effect “.

ALSOOOOOOO……..

I said that the butterfly COULD cause a hurricane.That’s a huge probability. Would be a negligible probability. NOT a huge one. if that were true, we would have cyclones on an hourly basis as butterflies keep flitting all over Africa and u don’t have so many cyclones to account for a HUGE probability.
Chaos,relativity and quantum mechanics are so damn weird that you will think I am talking metaphysics and pseudoscience.

Like for example,according to quantum mechanics,there is a finite probability that you will fall right through a solid chair.And it is a PROBABILITY.
Even 10 to the power -26 is finite .

But yes, Quantum Mechanics does allow for weird situations.

THE CONNECTION !!!!!

Guys check this link for a clear and complete explanation

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Butterfly_effect

In the above links u can see that butterfly’s wings might create tiny changes in the atmosphere that may ultimately alter the path of a tornado or delay, accelerate or even prevent the occurrence of a tornado in a certain location..

So in dasavatharam that idol thrown into sea in 12th century is the cause for tsunami…. so everything is interlinked .The wiki entry also says that chaos could play an important role in plate techtonics. Which means even the 12th century incident is connected.

The 1st scene is perfectly connected to the climax, remember what Kamal says in the 1st scene, that he will not say “Om Nama Shivaya” , but Asin tells him to chant it , but still Kamal refuses , ( in this kamal in his story tries to tell that ) Nambi believes in his god more than anything, but Asin feels “Its ok if we change the god or chant other god’s name, its life thats most important.” Now if u see the climax its JUST OPPOSITE…. Kamal doesn’t believe in god much and values lives of people the most…. but Asin deeply believes in god and that too this dialogue comes when both Asin and Kamal’s hand is on the god which came from the sea , and it also means that they are getting united from the place they departed hundreds of years back ( Kamal and Asin).The connection between the 1st scene and the climax in the movie shows the generation circle combined with supernatural powers of GOD and destiny…..!!!

If you watch it closely u can also find another actor who has done double action other than Asin and Kamal.
Asin’s father Sahasranamam [12th Century], in the beginning he says to Nambi “Panchatchira manthirathai sollitu vaango mappillai” and at the End [After tsunami] he says “Avar enna jathiyo inga vaanga paati “.
Another Eg. of Chaos Theory and circle of life.

JUST IMAGINE THE CHAOS THEORY IN A TAMIL FILM ??
WILL ANYONE HAVE THE GUTS TO HANDLE THIS KIND OF A SUBJECT IN A TAMIL FILM?

ONLY KAMAL HAS THE GUTS…. U ROCK!!

FURTHER————-

Nambi explanation

Okay, this is slightly outside the chaotic system driving the film as a whole.From what I could gather he says that this story is about ideologies like God,the madness surrounding such ideologies and decides to tell the story of the Shaivite-Vaishnavite conflict to show how people go crazy in the name of God as an example.

As a loose end,it gets tied up in the end,when the Ranganathar idol is thrown out of the sea due to the tsunami which highlights the cyclic nature of life.Actually the Nambi character highlights both Chaos and Karma which I explained.That is the brilliance of this film,there is so much to see and understand.

Another explanation(and this is slightly far fetched— as explained earlier) is that Govind is in fact the reincaranation of Nambi. As Nambi he couldn’t protect God and died in the name of God.In order to fulfill his Karma,he is reincarnated as Govind Ramasamy who ultimately saves the world from destruction.The idol in the end somewhat hints to this theory; his story began with the idol and it ends with the idol.
As far as the connection with Nambi character and events in 12th Century goes…
The connection is based on the “Butterfly effect “.

When Govind and Andal goes to the bury the idol in the sands, Andal will stumble on a particular stone couple of times…This is the same stone as the one from 12th Century hen Kothai rips her Thaali and flings it at Kulothunga Chozan…it will end up hanging on the stone. So, the implied message here is Andal is Kothai reborn in the 21s century.
During the encounter with Santhana Bharathi in the sand quarry, it is repeat of the incident from 12th century. Instead of Kulothunga Chozhan, it is the Sand Mafia which tries to inflict damage on the land.
This movie is a brilliant juxtaposition of independent characters whose paths cross, if only briefly, which is stunning example of Chaos Theory.

The idol that is drowned in the sea along with Rangarajan in 12th century by Chozha king results in a fault being developed at the bottom of the ocean and creates tremors more than 800 years later. These tremors result in the Tsunami. This again is a classic case of Butterfly Effect wherein a seemingly inconcsequential event (the drowing of the idol) saves Tamil Nadu from being wiped out off the face of the earth.

But actually kamal has not left anything for our imagination… Explanation struck the right chord, Kamal does tell to Asin in a dialogue that idol which gets sunken back then gets struck between the tectonic plates under the sea and causes tsunami…
Many people missed this dialogue i guess. Kamal’s accent was so very perfect Tamil, that many people missed it…. Being perfect Is a Problem by Itself !!!

Although the explanation is a least possible theory, that is what “Chaos Theory” And “Butterfly Effect” are all about.
Its not just the statue that caused the tsunami, but it just started a large chain of effects which kept multiplying exponentially and finally lead to it after 800 years….!!
Why just say this concept is perfectly illogical… it is possible… thats what i have been explaining all the while !!!

The story line is that things going wrong are made to be right which involves many people and countries knowingly or unknowingly.

Knowingly:

-Bush, Manmohan Singh, Govindh, Fletcher, Balaram Naidu, Mallika Sherawath.

Unknowingly:

-Nambi’s drowning to death with the heavy statue causes simple changes to the seabed that causes a devastating tsunami 800 years later [Acc. to Chaos theor it is possible.... although it is least probable... It is possible.. so nothing TOTALLY WRONG About it ]
-Poovaragan(actually saved kamal unknowingly—when poovaragan enters kamal and asin were caught by those manal kollayargal.There poovaragan distracts the gang helping kamal to escape),
- Avatar Singh(gave way to Fletcher to escape in the airport unknowingly),
- Japanese(saved govind from fletcher,he knows he is saving but he doesnt know about the play and was there only for revenge),
- Kallifulla and family(saved govind unknowingly)……..
-Vincent is a dalit leader of a lower caste( the so called ) but saved an Iyengar Girl ……and at the end becomes the son of the Iyengar Paati !!
- If Shingen Narahashi’s sister was not killed, Fletcher could have killed govind and used the virus for wrong purpose..

This is based on Chaos Theory..!!!!!

My brother left for India. Boohoo. And if that wasn’t enough, we went to terminal 5 of O’hare international airport to send him off. I don’t know about all the desi folks who live here, but for me, O’Hare terminal 5 feels like almost India.

As you watch fellow desi women, wearing their bright colored salwars (because m-i-l in India does not appreciate western clothes in India), clutching their big sized handbags, pushing along strollers, and followed by harried husbands who are pushing along oversized check-in baggage visibly worried about the weight, and trying to make their carry on baggage seem lighter than it is. Some of them have their bright colored laminated covers from India on their passports. You also see maamas and maamis, sometimes travelling single, looking very anxious about the long journey ahead, and being constantly advised by their sons not to worry about Heathrow airport or Frankfurt airport and to wait for the wheel chair. Grandparents bid tearful farewells as they try to get one more last glimpse of their children and grandchildren and wave to them every time they turn a corner of the serpentine security queue. An African boyfriend plants long kisses on the lips of his chinese girl friend, before he departs to the security queue, and helplessly watches her sob.

Terminal 5 is that last point before you leave for home. Once you’ve crossed that security check, you know you’re probably going to make it home. After a month of incessant India shopping, packing, unpacking and re-packing and weighing, at the few hours we get at the gate of the airport is when we can finally breathe a heavy sigh of relief. It’s our gateway to home in a foreign land. To reach that gateway and not go past it is very disappointing.

We were in India for the weekend - well almost! We were in Niagara falls for memorial day weekend, and I had to see it to believe it - there were more desis there, than all of Pallagoundapalayam put together. One friend had told us, that on memorial day weekend, there would be so many desis that it would be difficult to find a good patch of grass that was not already covered by a jamakaalam and desis sitting on it. A combination of telugus, tamilians, maharashtrians, hindi speaking and IndiEnglish speaking crowd, some of whom were the typical TCS, Infy, CTS, Covansys groups talking in typical ‘Yes ya No ya’ lingo. Others were young families with parents from India - typical vaira thoddu maamis and maamas wearing layers of over-sized jackets and shoes and mufflers on a what we would consider a fairly warm day and trying to push along sleeping babies in strollers. Some of those were a bit more adventurous, wrapping up few month olds in blankets and ponchos, standing in line for more than an hour to see the cave of the winds, and then eventually making the trip down with wailing babies in hand.

The falls themselves were totally worth it. Huge volumes of water pouring over cliffs. The American falls, looked a little bit threatening and powerful. The horse shoe falls on the other hand were so graceful in their fall. The maid of the mist and the cave of the winds were both a unique experience. I would love to go there again, just this time, I would try to stay in a hotel with view of the falls.

It made me wonder, what it was that we desis saw that the locals apparently didn’t care for that much. A person at work who is probably in her 50s now, said she visited Niagara once when she was 2 and had no recollection of it. Perhaps, it is the idea that they cannot really camp out there and that Niagara falls cannot really be considered a spot for adventurous white water rafting, or skiing or quiet fishing. But we as an Indian population, really try to visit places that are a pleasure mainly to the eye, not necessarily something that requires physical interaction with nature or any kind of adventure. Perhaps, it is the lack of finding similar such spots (in South India) back home. Perhaps, it is the need for us to find a place that is friendly to people of all ages, us, our parents and our wailing babies, a place where vegetarian food is at least a possibility and the restrooms physically stay in the same place all the time.

It is no wonder then, that I spotted atleast 3 or 4 Indian restaurants within a few blocks (though they served shoddy food for the price, and were way too overcrowded).

All in all, I would have to say I had an enjoyable road trip (my first one in this country), and a memorable experience at the falls. Those of you, who haven’t yet been there, be sure to make a trip to this desi hot spot of America.

Now.. enjoy some pictures..

So for some background here - I came to the US in the fall of 2004. It was quickly followed by winter which I didn’t want to spend sight-seeing. So I decided to wait until summer, but then I got pregnant and couldn’t travel. Then my daughter was too small and I couldn’t travel. So after spending close to 3.5 years here, I have seen so many pictures of New York City, Niagara and Washington DC, that I feel like I have already been there.

At the end of this sob-story of me being stuck in Chicago all along, comes light at the end of the tunnel. My daughter finally turned 2 and appeared manageable, and so we decided to start travelling around. Last weekend, we went to New York city, and I got a taste of the city. The big apple was sweet for most part, but the few sour parts of it, left a bad taste in the mouth.

Our flight got delayed by about 4 hours - so we were stuck with entertaining a toddler in a fairly boring and big airport. Then we slept at 3 in the morning, because that’s how long it took us to finally reach Connecticut, where we stayed. The next morning, we visited the Statue of Liberty and Ellis island - which I have to accept, was quite interesting and gave us beautiful views of the city and the water around it. Then we went around Wall street and I was still quite comfortable. I had always looked forward to seeing Madame Tussards museum, and that was worth it too.

Then we went to Times square - and gosh! what a place! The place was so packed, we couldn’t even push the stroller. We were perenially scared of losing each other or our belongings. Our feet were begging us to sit down somewhere. The lights were good, there were lots of people on the ground, but way too many people for my liking. I would rather go to Ranganathan street and walk in those crowds - atleast it is India, and you know exactly where you are going. My logic is - Why would one go to Times square if one was not interested in those noisy bars, fancy restaurants or didn’t have time for the broadway shows? To see the lights? It takes a minute to see them, beyone that you’re probably being pushed to the side by people walking up and down anyway. So, we (or I) decided  - enough of this, let’s go home.

So, we went down to the train station to catch a train to Jersey city, and had what was the sourest point of the whole trip. The ticket machines only let you buy one ticket at a time. There was only two of them, both of which did not accept bills at that time. We didn’t have enough change, and the only store there refused to help. So we tried paying with card, but the machine kept rejecting it. So as we stood in line, my brother and I kept trying one card after the other, only to keep getting rejected. And while we did that, there was the rudest person I have ever encountered in my life standing right behind, cursing me in curses that I would consider strongly objectionable. At the end of a day that was started with little sleep and spent mostly on my feet, the experience of trying to buy train tickets really drove me mad. At that moment, I felt like I had had enough of New York. It was not my kind of city. Chicago probably was. I never felt so vulnerable and out of place in Chicago.

So as much as I have tried the past couple of days to look past the few sour experiences in NYC, I have not be able to say ‘I love NY’, the way the t-shirts too.

My next trip, I would really love to spend more time with my friends, relax at their homes, play with their kids, and perhaps just enjoy the view of the NY skyline as the plane takes off.

Sorry, big apple, you were too sour for me!

Every desi that lives here, goes through what can be mind-numbingly boring at the very least, before they visit India - India shopping. No, I am not going to India anytime now.. Sigh! What prompted me to write about this, is the insanely long shopping list I sent to my mother, so she could pack up one of those bulging suitcases that came with my brother this weekend.

So, what is all the deal about. There was a time when, you got stuff in the US, that you didn’t find in India. My peripa (uncle) who moved here about 26 years ago, came home only once in 4 years, called my grandmother once in a month, and called us once in 6 months (perhaps). But when he came home, and opened up his suitcase, we saw a lot of things, we didn’t normally see.

1. Bic Use and throw Pens: Those were very novel when we first saw them, because around then, I used to use those fat ink pens, which had see through ink chambers, and you needed a dropper to fill up. If you got careless, you would overfill them and spill blue ink all over the place. If you were rough with the pen, you might break the nib, and if you were forgetful (like my father), you could put it in your pocket without putting the cap on, and come back home with a big blue patch on your shirt.

2. Disposable Razors: My father and grandfather had a 7 o’clock Edjtech (or something like that) blade, which they carefully handled, put it back in it’s case after every use, until it got dull as a blade of grass. These bright yellow disposable razors, seemed like such a convenient alternative.

3. Hair spray: My uncle always bought me hair spray. To this date, I’ve never really figured out what to do with it. But I tried using it for what it was worth, and found that the results were quite abominable. My hair was no longer smooth and shiny the way it was supposed to be.

4. T-shirts: Bright colored t-shirts that had american basketball, football and baseball team names on them. Of course, we had no clue what the cubs or the bears meant - just thought it was a cool t-shirt and wore it till we outgrew it and then handed it down to cousins who took it all starry-eyed.

5. Crockery: Pyrex and Corningware dishes were so cool. Nobody ever used anything other than the boringly sparkling stainless steel those days. So anything that was glass or porcelein was ‘fashionable’ and ‘classy’. Though my mother was an exception, I doubt if many people really knew how to bake or had an oven for that matter.

6. Shampoos, Moisturizers: Huge bottles of colorful and good-smelling shampoos were always welcome and used till the last drop. Shampoos were so much easier than the yucky ’shikha’ powder that stuck to everything and was such a pain to wash off. If at all we bought shampoo in India, we only bought the small sachets from which we squeezed out every last drop to manage to get all our hair shampooed.

7. Electric Razors, Hair dryers, toasters, etc: All of this always left you feeling bad. With the converters that were so rarely available those days, these appliances would moderately perform for a couple of months, and then one of the two things - appliance or adapter would conk off and you were left with a whole bunch of useless appliances.

So all of these things and more.. made us look forward to the huge bulging suitcases that came from America. Now that everybody has at least one son or daughter settled in the US, and also because India has become so much of an America itself, buying gifts for people in India is clearly one of the most difficult things to do. Whatever you think of buying is already available in India. In some cases, it’s made in India and sent to the US. In other cases, it’s cheaper or better in India than in the US.

So, when you go to Wal-Mart and stand there by the Home appliances, or Home Decor, or Kitchen aisle, wondering what it is that perhaps your aunt or niece or cousin needs from here, you’re probably right when you think, that they have everything they need except you who are standing at a Wal-mart aisle half way across the world. But when someone in India is standing at one end of Pondy bazaar, wondering what in the world someone who earns in $$ in America needs from those dirty shacks on the roadside, it’s a whole different story - there are endless possibilities.

I turned a year older last week and I didn’t feel as excited as I usually do when the day started. I knew there was no surprise gift from my husband, because he had let me choose my own gift. I guessed I would not have any surprise parties either because I had just had one the previous year. I had to go to work and had a lot of work lined up for the day. I had picked up a new set of clothes a week earlier while grocery shopping at Sam’s club. So, nothing exciting happened. I was beginning to feel that may be I had finally grown out of the birthday excitement age group.

However, it was not to remain so. Our good friends and my brother in law and his wife surprised me, by first leading me to beleive that they had planned a surprise which had flopped because one of them couldn’t get there in time, and then when I had let down my guard, they ended up surprising me anyway. So, we started with a cake cutting, ate samosas, gulab jamuns and ended with pizza.

So, thank you Fa for always remembering but pretending to forget, to P for sitting through it patiently because I know how much you hate this stuff, to S for singing ‘happy birthday’ so beautifully (you have definitely improved over the past 3 years), to V for the beautiful card and the personal note in it, to the other V for the 80 gulab jamuns that you took the trouble to make and to dear husband and dear daughter for being the special people that they are.

Thank you for making me realize I am not so old after all.. and to all you folks who weren’t a part of the birthday bash and are bored of the vote of thanks addressed to alphabetized folks, chill.. I promise the next post will be better.

When I was a fresh off the boat desi, I was quite amused by the friendliness of americans in spite of being perfect strangers. They would smile at you, comment on the weather, hurriedly enquire on how you were doing as they jogged past you on the sidewalk. In stark contrast, I noticed that desis just saw right through you - as if you did’nt exist. Unlike now, at that point of time I was quite oblivious to the ins and outs of desi behaviour in the US. But soon enough, I learnt to be stone-faced when I faced other desis and appear friendly to non-desis. Asian (not south asian) people are an exception here, and due to my limited knowledge of their characteristics, I am quite unable to explain their reason for being stone-faced.

Indian stone-facedness has a reason. I learnt it the hard way. During the first one or two months in the US, I seemed to fall victim more than once to the uncharacteristicly stranger-desi-friendly desis. The first time, my friend A (who had been around 3 years and still didn’t know) and I were at Kohl’s looking around. A desi lady and her 5 year old daughter commented on how pretty my red embroidered kurti was and got to talking about which part of India etc.. etc.. In my over-enthusiasm to make new friends, I was very happy to exchange numbers with her. In a week, she called me and enquired if I would be interested in making more money on the internet. I pressed for more details and was surprised to see that no further information was forthcoming. I told her I would talk to my husband and get back, and when I told him, he told me this was one of those Amway kind of schemes. I was never interested in that kind of thing and so the next time she called, I politely declined saying I had found a job and didn’t have time. But, this lesson was not enough. In a few weeks, I saw a desi lady at Sams club with her twin little boys. The kids were so cute, that I was watching them and (by mistake) returned the mother’s smile. That was an invitation for her to trap me. She came over spoke very sweetly, said she was working in the IT industry in downtown Chicago, and commented on how her sister had the same name as me, etc..  The fact that she was in the IT industry somehow convinced me that she wasn’t one of those marketing types, so I gladly gave her my phone number when she asked. Soon enough she called me and asked if I was interested in trying out some beauty products and that her friend was going to display it at her home etc. Should have know it’s one of those Avon marketing schemes. So I told her right away that I wasnt interested in any of these marketing schemes. Since then, I’ve been really careful not to appear like I have any interest in desis around me, and I’ve learnt to put on my best stone-face when I see them. Our latest experience was however hard to avoid. The couple out of nowhere called out loudly “Madrasaaa?” at JCPenney and eagerly told us what they do and spoke to my daughter as if they were her ‘god parents’. My husband and I knew something was fishy but because we didn’t want to snub them, gave them our phone number, but we have been careful since then not to pick up their call. After all the conversation did end with “I will get in touch with you, my friend is doing some market research, so you might be able to help”.

Unfortunately, we could end up being really rude to the genuinely friendly people. We almost did that to one couple (P & S) who wanted to talk to us because they had just moved to our apartment community and hadn’t found any indians around. Fortunately, they were quite persistent and we soon found that they had no evil intentions. They are now very good friends of ours.

So much for kinship..

I recently read this post by Bikerdude, and instantly identified him to be my kind - the kind that has lived in many different places, and speaks more than one indian language.

In India, I lived in 4 cities in 22 years, regularly visited one other. I liked all the places I lived in for different reasons, and therefore don’t really think any one place to be a favorite over another.

During the four years that we spent living in the ’Kongunadu’ of Tamil Nadu, I was often asked a most baffling question - ‘Onga native ennanga?’, to which I wish I had a simple one-word reply, but unfortunately didn’t. This is how it would it go from there..

Me: Well.. I finished my schooling in Hyderabad… (and before I finished)..

They: Oh.. Teluguvaa..? You speak such good tamil though.. (already wondering how..)

Me: Oh..well, I am actually Tamilian..

They: Appdiya.. Appo onga “NATIVE” edhunga?

Me: I don’t have a native place. My father grew up in many places, but you could say he is a native of Bangalore. (Before they jump to the next assumption..), but he is not a kannadiga, he is a tamilian too.  My mother is from Salem, but I’ve never lived in either Salem or Bangalore, so technically, I cannot be called a native of those places.

They: Well, then your native place is Hyderabad… I guess..

Me: Um.. well.. we moved out of Hyderabad last year, and we have no ties with the place anymore. No family there anymore.

They: (By now utterly confused, at the prospect that there could be a person without a native place).. Appo.. Did your father work in a bank?

Me: No, he is not a bank officer. He just changed jobs (and not every year), just once every 8 years may be.

So, I spent 4 years in Kongunaadu, and then moved to Chennai for the second time. Realized nothing had changed since the 80s - still no water, still too hot and humid. I worked there, got married and lived there for a year before we moved to the US.

Now that I am not in India anymore, I am still asked questions about where I am from - and because I’ve decided that the last place I’ve lived in is to be henceforth my native place, I used ‘Chenna’ to anwer the darned question.

Other desis I meet here (including my husband), often reminisce about their favourite hometowns (chennai, bangalore, hyderabad, etc.). I have very good memories, but spread across all these places, and therefore there are times when I never feel completely Madrasi or Hyderabadi or Kongu.

The perception of ‘back home’ or India for most desis here usually means Chennai, Bangalore or Hyderabad (wherever they belong), but for me, it is hard to choose one place over another. For me India is, not any one city or place. To me ‘back home’ means just India where I will be closer to my family and friends, wherever in India that might be. It is the feeling of getting off a plane and smelling the myriad of smells, hearing the cacophony of porters and taxiwallas, feeling the heat when it’s hot and the cold when it’s cold, seeing the crowds of people going about their business (and others),  those gigantic posters of politicians and super starts, be it Pondy bazar, Commercial street or Oppanakara veedhi.

Hmmm.. India…

..Continued from The species called ‘Desi consultant’ - Part 2.

I have putting off writing the 3rd and probably final part of this series not only because I have been fairly preoccupied on suddenly finding myself on bench, but also because there are so many random thoughts that I’ve not quite been able to get it organized into a coherent piece. So here goes one more attempt.

There really is no career strategy when it comes to desi consulting. You follow the money and go where it leads you. If you don’t have or do what it takes, then you might just end up on bench for long periods of time, where you begin to doubt the purpose of your existence etc.. So, when you encounter such hurdles as unsuitability or under-qualification or inexperience, with the help of able specimens from the species called ‘desi recruiters’ (they deserve not a blog series but a book by themselves), you cross all hurdles by using several proven methods to reach goal green!

To start with, one has to reconcile to the fact that there is no moral high ground here. Here are some qualities that hold us all in good stride:

1. Writing in circles 

One should be adept not at the technology they claim to be experts at but at knowing how best to rephrase and re-rephrase their resumes, so that they appear to be a tailor-made candidate for the requirement in hand. Of course, clients know better than to trust resumes, so they ask for an interview (on the phone), and when that happens, the desi consultants secondary set of skills come into play.

2. Talking in ellipses and circles (also called Dumeel quotient):

That of talking not in circles, but big ellipses and circles and that upon completion of the answer to his question, the interviewer is invariably confused into the belief that what the desi consultant said was probably right.

3. Impersonability:

Those that have below average dumeel quotient might have to walk the extra mile and be prepared to donate their identity temporarily to an impersonator who either has a good dumeel quotient or has good technical quotient at the skills required. That means they will have to get somebody else to impersonate them on the phone during the interview. Of course, this means that one has to be prepared to throw all nagging thoughts of being straightforward to the winds.

4. Networkability

Once settled at a project, that you were not qualified to do in the first place, you summon your skills at networking. All the contacts you made at the alumni association, Sunday temple visits, grocery store visits and boring parties, are put to the test. These people act as your 24×7 call centre. A call to your senior from college that says “Anna.. have you worked on this?” (to be aptly translated to Telugu in most cases), will solve your problem as you hang on to the phone on the one hand, and do the necessary stuff with the other.

And this is how, most of us survive and make our money. If we still do this, and have a reputation for pretty much running the technology consulting industry in this country, it is because we are smart and we know how to adapt to our surroundings at the same time adding value to our customers and to our bank accounts.

What does everyone say? Correctaaa?